Am I having a midlife crisis? Is my world falling apart now? Is this how the rest of my life is going to be? I can’t handle this! Lordy dis tew much!!
Sound like you? Sound familiar? Girl, you ain’t alone. Every now and then some crazy midlife symptom pops up and I freak dafuk out. Oh God please just make it all stop (picture cute little me crying big crocodile tears 😭)
So listen. Here we are. In midlife. Trying to navigate this the best way we know how. Unfortunately, many of us don’t know how. I feel ya and I got you covered. Kind of.
Before we talk about this midlife crisis nonsense I think it’s important to determine whether or not you’re actually having one.
Today we’re gonna talk an awful lot about midlife crisis symptoms, midlife crisis behaviour, how to get out of a midlife crisis and so much more. Grab your favourite drink and let’s go!!
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Am I having a midlife crisis?
Or am I just getting old and cranky? Or maybe both? Or am I having a midlife crisis, for real? Chances are, it’s the latter. Things are different. Life is starting to feel weird and so are you.
I almost knew the exact moment I realized that I was having a midlife crisis. I had just left my abusive relationship (you can learn more about that here), had just hit rock bottom and was totally lost in this world. I was alone and scared and started to feel different.
Really different. It’s kinda hard to explain but I think you know what I mean.
In case you aren’t sure what I mean, I’m gonna go through 10 signs of a midlife crisis in a woman and see if you recognize yourself in any of them.
Can you have a midlife crisis at 30?
Or what about 35? Can you have a midlife crisis at 35? When exactly does this whole midlife crisis thing really start anyway?
I’ve done some research for you and yes, you actually can have a midlife crisis at 35 or 30 or 40. Yes, 30 does seem young but keep in mind, some of us mature much faster than others. We go through life changes sooner, we age quicker. We’re not all built the same.
So in doing my research you can actually go through a midlife crisis anywhere from 30-65. It’s a wide range but I think it explains a lot to people who are struggling with some of the changes they are going through.
Ok, let’s get to the signs of a mc (midlife crisis).
10 Signs of a midlife crisis in a woman
Now before we begin, don’t get too worried if you have one or all of these signs. As we reach midlife, a lot of things change, that doesn’t necessarily mean you are having a mc. Throughout our entire lives we change approximately every 7 years. You could just be going through simple life changes.
1 Feelings of anxiety
I’m going through this now at 59 years old. It’s weird and I hate it but it’s happening. Actually I’m having little panic attacks that come right out of the blue and scare the poop out of me, not to mention they suck.
2 Feeling of emptiness
Emptiness like you don’t feel worthy or fulfilled. It’s kinda like, you sit and often wonder “what in the world am I here for”. You wonder if there’s something more you should be seeking.
3 Sadness or loneliness
Much like #2, but sometimes you just get sad. Sometimes for no reason, sometimes because you feel like your life is half over and you’re starting to get scared and sad about it. Regardless of how much joy and how many blessings you have in your life, sadness still shows up.
4 You get restless
You start feeling very unsettled and restless, like you should be doing more or going places or something! Perhaps there’s a goal you haven’t achieved yet. Or maybe you are just feeling unsettled with your friends, job, life in general.
5 Making changes in appearance
Sometimes drastic changes. You may have went from being a brunette with long hair to chopping it all off and embracing your grey! Or maybe you tossed out all your boring clothes and are wearing more sassy clothes. Whatever the case, you go girl!!
6 Tripping down memory lane, a lot
You’re starting to think back when you were a teenager in love with your first boyfriend. Or maybe that Christmas dinner when the kids were young and fun. It could be that you’re just thinking about your younger days more often, how you looked, what you did, who your friends were, etc.
7 Thinking of other men 😮
I’m not sure if this is just a midlife crisis thing but let’s face it, if you’ve been making out with the same dude, aka your husband, for over 25 years, surely you’re gonna have thoughts about the dude who pumps your gas maybe? I think this is totally natural to be honest so don’t feel guilty or bad about that.
8 You lost your ‘gaf’ attitude
Meaning, like you don’t gaf anymore about things that used to really get to you. You also don’t really gaf about a lot of frivolous and trivial stuff you and your friends used to chat about. Seems nothing really matters these days anymore, or at least, they don’t really bother you much. This is a good symptom of a midlife crisis if you ask me!
9 You don’t feel sexy or worthy anymore
And you quite possibly could be comparing yourself to 25 year olds. Please don’t do that. But suddenly you feel ugly, old, fat, skinny, creepy, not sexy or pretty. I mean girl, we’re getting older and we ain’t 25 anymore but that doesn’t mean you still aren’t beautiful! Of course you are!
10 Making radical changes in your life
I did this. At 52. I traded in my 25+ yr hairstyling career in for a freelance writer life, I got rid of 95% of my belongings and bought a one way ticket to Guatemala. Talk about radical changes. Many men and women during midlife, will make these crazy awesome radical changes (you can read more about mine here).
Not mentioned in here, I also noticed, and it’s not just me, that many midlife men and women tend to want to date younger women/men. I discuss this a lot more here. I’m not gonna lie. I dream of having a hot young man in my bed, whenever, however…ooph!
Would I actually date one though? Not likely.
What about those crazy physical changes??
As we grow older and our bodies start aging, there is some seriously crazy s*it that goes on with our bodies. Our girls start drooping, our skin gets crepey, and those wrinkles. Ah well.
For me the biggest and hardest physical change was painful sex but that happened after my full hysterectomy. I imagine this happens to many women, though, who went through, are going through or finished going through menopause.
This was a tough one for me because, well, I kinda like having sex but it became excruciatingly painful. For the longest time I had no clue what was going on until my doc told me and sent me to the pharmacy to get moisturizer for my girl. Hell-O!! How did I not know about any of this?
I use this moisturizer and love it though it’s super hard to find it here in Guatemala so I did some Googling and realized I can make my own with plain old Coconut oil. Thank you baby Jesus!
Are you experiencing midlife crisis behaviour?
Now while I’ve only discussed 10 signs of a midlife crisis, I’m sure there are a million more. I love this description:
People who are having a midlife crisis are thought to be struggling with their own mortality and, somewhere during midlife, they ditch some of their responsibilities in favor of fun. That’s why the term “midlife crisis” often causes people to picture mistresses and sports cars.Source : Verywellmind
Honestly, for me, I think it’s pretty easy to spot someone who is going through a mc. Just check out the clothes they wear, their attitudes, the way they talk and present themselves. I gotta say, I feel that women who are going through this now have way more confidence in themselves then ever before.
The women who have that I don’t gaf attitude. Those are the ones! That’s the kind of midlife behaviour I admire!!
How to get out of a mc
I recently wrote another article on mc. I realized that there wasn’t enough information from real straight talking kinda people (like me) on this subject so I thought I’d chime in.
I think it’s important to note that whatever you are experiencing is very normal and you certainly aren’t alone even though you feel like you are.
Please check out this article I wrote on how to get through a midlife crisis. It’s full of great tips and tricks that I’m sure will help you. Though it may seem to last forever and it’s frustrating af, I need to remind you that it doesn’t last forever and you will get through it.
For me, I found this to be a growing stage and I embraced it, all of it, minus the effin panic attacks. UGH!!!
Learning to embrace it all and aging gracefully
We’re not 25 anymore. I know, it’s sad. I think back to my nice tight butt and my perky boobs. My beautiful skin and the fact that nothing hurt back then (ie: joints, knees, muscles, shoulders, etc).
Life was beautiful and fun back then.
But that doesn’t mean it can’t be beautiful and fun now! Actually, it can be even funner (ya, that’s a word)!! That whole don’t gaf attitude and the fact that I lost my ‘filter’ a long time ago makes for some interesting conversations.
I miss my youth, a lot, I’m not gonna lie and say “Oh getting old is great and I’m all about aging gracefully”! I mean I’m doing my best to age beautifully but I’ll be honest, I wish I was 25 or 30 or even 35 but I do love the skin I’m in now too though.
I think I look pretty damn good for my age (60 next year!) and I’m taking the best care of myself now too. I quit smoking last year and I rarely drink, I eat well, take lots of good vitamins and minerals.
You might like this article on best vitamins women over 50 should take daily.
You too can age gracefully or let old age take control of you. The choice is yours. The rest of your life can absolutely be the best of your life if you want it to. I’m totally loving this stage in my life.