Life can be unpredictable. You may be moving ahead, achieving your goals, and then suddenly, life throws you a curveball, and in the blink of an eye, your whole world falls apart. You start swimming in a sea of anxiety, and you feel like you have lost everything. I know how that feels. I’ve been there a few times. It can be challenging to see a way out when you are in the depths of despair, but there is a way out. Here are 15 tips to help when everything is falling apart around you and feel hopeless. The very first thing and most important thing you need to do is this
Analyze the Situation
This may sound like a no-brainer, but so many don’t do this. Dig deep and figure out just how bad things really are. Do you think you can recover from this in a month, 6 months, or a year? How long will it take to resolve this catastrophic issue that is ruining your life? Will you need help resolving this, or can you do it on your own? Do you know of others who have been through the same and survived (which brings us to #2)?
Reach Out to Others
We hate asking for help. Swallow your pride. There is someone out there who has been through what you are going through and made it. Maybe one of your closest friends or family members or maybe an influencer online! Believe it or not, these people are more than happy to help, but they don’t know you need help unless you ask.
Find a Support Group
Trust me when I say someone somewhere has been where you are and survived. Chances are, you’ll find them in a support group helping others, just like you. Facebook can be a goldmine for finding groups in your local area. You can also check your local cafes, churches, libraries, etc., for the support group you need.
Take Time to Grieve
Grieving is an important step in the healing process. Take a week or two, a month if you need to, and cry your eyes out, curl up in a corner and sob hysterically, Punch pillows, scream at the air, become a hermit, you do your grieving however feels right and therapeutic for you. But don’t stay in that dark place. Take some time, not forever. It’s just as important not to stay down.
Journal Your Feelings
Take some time to journal. Actually, you should aim to journal daily. Write out all the things you still have that you are grateful for, and yes, that will seem hard to do, but try anyway. Sometimes, when we write things out and then read them back later, we can see it’s not as bad as we thought. Besides, writing is so therapeutic! So get it all out, the good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful.
Be Kind to Yourself
Don’t beat yourself up. Whatever happened, no matter how horrible it is, and yes, maybe it was your fault, this is how we learn. We grow and learn from our mistakes. They will make you stronger. Do something nice for yourself, no matter how little it is. Be kind to yourself.
If no one knows about your situation, people may still reach out and ask you to do things for them that you know you simply can’t. Set boundaries and start saying no to others while you go through this healing process. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup, so take the necessary time to fill yours back up.
Pull Your Resources Together
Whether that be people’s knowledge or skills, pull all your resources together to see if you can come up with some kind of plan or solution for this issue you are dealing with right now. Find someone who can help you, or maybe it’s time to learn something new to get yourself out of this mess.
Practice Self Care
Take time to care for yourself, body, mind, and spirit. You are going through a really tough time now that is overwhelming and feels completely hopeless. Don’t wallow in despair day in and day out. Soak in a hot bubble bath, pick some flowers, and take yourself out for a picnic. It doesn’t matter how big or small, do something that’s good for you!
Yes, you need to get outside in the fresh air, clear your mind and your head, and walk. It’s easy to fall into a depression when your life falls apart, but you have to make sure you avoid that. Exercising and getting out and walking is a great way to do that. You still need to take care of your physical health, which, in turn, will help your mental health.
Exercise and Stay Active
It’s no secret that exercise is not only good for your physical health but for your mental health, too. Whether you want to work out at home or join/have a gym membership, make sure you are exercising at least 3 times a week. More if you can! While this won’t solve your problems, it will help you have a clearer head to deal with them.
There is no better way to heal and forget your troubles than to go help others. Volunteering is an amazing way to grow and put all your troubles and sorrows away. It’s also a great way to meet new people. You never know who you are going to meet that can completely change your world. I volunteered at the food banks here, and it was the best thing I ever did in my entire life.
Seek Professional Help
If your situation feels completely out of control and you can’t function because of stress and anxiety, it might be a good idea to talk to a professional. Even if it’s just one or two sessions. It’s important to invest in ourselves when we can. There are also plenty of free online tools for people who need help, but it’s not quite in their budget.
Make a Plan
You need to start figuring out how to dig your way out of this mess. Yes, maybe your life is falling apart, but it doesn’t have to fall to the ground never to be revived again. It’s up to you to bring it back to ‘life,’ if you will. Write out what all your troubles are, and day by day, take small action steps to a brighter, happier future. If it’s a financial issue you are dealing with, there are ways to get out of financial ruin. Talk to a professional about this if you can.
Dump Toxic People and Things
This probably should have been #1. Did toxic things, people, or habits put you in the position you are in? It might be time to take inventory of your life and see who and what must go and who and what can stay. It’s okay to remove toxic people from your life. Sometimes, it’s mandatory! When your life falls apart, you have to wonder if someone else might have had a hand in it.
It probably feels desperate and hopeless right now, but trust me, it’s not. Things always have a way of working themselves out. Try doing some of the things above and have faith. This isn’t how your story ends. You’re going to be ok.
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