I have to admit it took me an awfully long time to become a strong woman. For years I was a quiet, submissive shy church mouse until one day I wasn’t anymore. This didn’t happen until I was well into my 50’s.
There’s something magical and liberating about being a 50-something-year-old woman, and if you are part of the women over 50 tribe, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
I remember thinking when I was in my 20s and 30s that 50 seemed so old, and my whole life would just be crap then. Little did I know. Life actually begins at 50 amirite?
So before we get started, this is my list of 15 things that I don’t really gaf about anymore, but in talking to many of my 50-year-old friends, they feel the same way too. Feel free to add to this list in the comments section below. I’m sure I missed hundreds of things other women over 50 don’t care about, either!
15 Things Women Over 50 Don’t Gaf About
In absolutely no particular order of importance, here we go…
1 How long my hair is.
You’ve probably heard it a thousand times from your hairstylist. Women over 50 with long hair is a no-no. I subscribed to that idea (or myth) for a long time until I didn’t. I wear my hair long and hope it grows down to my butt.
I love my hair and I don’t care if it makes me look older or not. I’m not parting with my hair.
2 The clothes I’m ‘supposed to’ wear.
Yup. Apparently, when you’re a woman over 50 you have to dress like Mary friggin’ Poppins. Hard pass. While I don’t wear high heels anymore or mini skirts, it doesn’t stop me from being ballsy and bold in my fashion style either.
You might really love this recent blog post I wrote about 10 things women over 50 should never wear. <(you should really read this one!)
3 Dating age range.
Many people are shocked and almost disgusted when they hear a woman over 50 dating a man in his 30’s 40’s or even 20’s. We don’t care what you think. Leave us alone. We’re having fun.
4 Use of foul language.
Now, this really holds true for any woman because ‘they say’ it’s not ladylike to swear and they will make sure to tell us that we shouldn’t swear because it makes us look like trash or stupid. Good grief. Whatever. I’ll drop eff bombs til my dying day. And I AM a lady and even if I’m not…
5 If we are ladies or not.
This word ‘ladies’ is overrated. I’m a human and a woman. The rest is irrelevant. I’m smart, sassy, confident, brave, fun, bla bla bla. Do you think I care if ‘lady’ makes the list or not?
6 If you like me.
Your approval or acceptance of me is not required. If you like me, that’s cool, if you don’t, well that’s cool too. Idrgaf.
7 The neighbour’s personal life.
I don’t want to know that Mr. Jones is having an affair on Mrs. Jones. First of all, it’s none of my business (or yours for that matter) and secondly, I don’t subscribe to gossip. Neither should you. Grow up.
8 If I hurt your feelings.
Not in a deliberate mean way, but if I have to say no to you and it hurts your feelings that’s not my cross to bear. Those are your feelings and emotions, not mine. I am not responsible if things personally offend you.
9 The troubles you had/have with your ex.
If we’re just hooking up, or just started dating, I seriously don’t want to hear about how horrible your ex was/is and all the terrible things she put you through. I don’t care. If you’re still hanging on to all that then we’re done.
Move on, sunshine. No one gaf.
10 Getting older.
We have wrinkles and grey hair. Maybe our “girls” aren’t as perky as they used to be. Maybe we don’t have the figure we did when we were in our 20’s or 30’s. We are doing our best to age gracefully and that’s all that matters to us.
11 How many friends you have.
This isn’t high school. I keep my circle tight, and it’s a small circle. If you have 100 friends, good for you Felicia. How many are true friends and how many of them can’t wait to talk about you behind your back?
This isn’t a competition, babe.
12 How much money you make.
Or how much money your husband makes. Or your son/daughter who just graduated with honours and nailed a great job at a law firm. I mean we’re happy for you but stop bragging. We get it. You’re rich.
13 How much your house is worth.
While we’re talking about money and net worth, I don’t care about any of that. How big your house is, how much it’s worth, how much your new bag is worth. Please just stop.
And stop being so materialistic. I have a newsflash for you, things and money don’t buy happiness.
14 Your latest plastic surgery appointment.
Or “girl” job. Or tummy tuck. Or butt implants. Or permanent eyeliner/eyebrows. OR how much it cost.
Listen, I’m happy for you, really. If that’s your thing, have it. It’s not my thing and I have a very different opinion about it and I’m def not your girl to share it with.
15 Your opinion of me.
Honestly. I don’t gaf what you think about me. I don’t live my life for you, I live it for me. And your opinion of me is none of my business. If you hate me, hate me alone.
Don’t be trying to convince others to hate me with you.
Being a strong woman over 50
They say when you get to a certain age, a lot of things just don’t matter. Unfortunately, they still do for some. I stopped caring about what I look like, how I dress, and what you think of me a few years ago. I am beautiful and comfortable in my own skin and that’s what being a strong woman over 50 is all about.
You really should check out this blog post
How to Dress Over 50-10 Things You Should Never Ever Wear!!
To be honest, I think this idgaf attitude even hits women over 40 (maybe even over 30?). As we grow in our confidence we slowly stop stressing over stupid little things. We embrace who we are and flash it in pride in hopes other women our age will follow suit!
Women over 50 have seen a lot
We came, we saw, we learned, we grew. And we keep on growing and glowing. I swear, being in my 50’s is the most amazing and awesome time of my life. I face fear, I speak my truth, I do what I want when I want and I am always 100% unapologetically me.
There’s an incredible freedom that comes with being a woman over 50 who is confident in her skin and totally loves life.
And I friggin love it.
xo iva xo
Love all of your articles so much!!!
Idgaf what people think either….
I always say , “you do you, and I’ll do me!”
My daughter is 25yo, and gets so anxious about what others think about her. (Is this my child?? )
My response to her anxiety is, “you wouldn’t care so much about what others think about you, if you realized how little they actually do!”
You inspire….
Keep it up!
Hahaha I remember caring what people thought when I was that age too. And now here we are not giving any fucks at all….:) Thanx for reading!
I’m about to be 63 — and I just read this. It is great advice. Keep on preachin it sister!
Thank you!!! xo
Ditto All The Comments! 50+ Women ROCK!!!
I feel the same way and really don’t care what people think of me. Never have, never will. It is really freeing to have felt this way for years!!!
Atta girl!!! Best feeling ever.
I LOVE this!!!! My mother still likes to remind me that somethings are not lady like, I just remind her that I am now of the age that I have earned the right to say what I want and not feel bad about it. Most of the time when I do share I am brutally honest and it confused people. My favorite quote? “You can’t sprinkle bullsh!t with sugar and call it a cupcake.”
Keep on, keepin’ on and you do you!!!!!
Ha I love that quote!!!Thanx for reading and sharing your thoughts! xoxo
I am a 83 yr old woman and I could not gaf who thinks what about me. I am married to the most selffish man who is exactley like his (dear departed) mother and it took me years to get used to his lies and meanness! After reading your thoughts and feelings I am about to put on my clothes and go out. Let him wonder where I am for a change. Thanks for being so open about things that hit home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh girl so sorry…you go and do you for a change!!!!!
I will finish my 66th trip around the sun in a couple of days. Your list could not have come at a better time. Recently I figured out that being assertive and saying no to someones request will not hurt them. In fact, saying yes when I want to say no hurts them and me. Being true to myself and being honest with others is empowering and gets easier every day. Thanks for the early birthday present!