Childhood abuse can leave deep scars, not just physical but also emotional ones. Two of the most common emotions survivors battle with are anger and resentment. While these emotions are valid and understandable, they can also be incredibly burdensome to carry.
It took me a long time to release the toxic emotions from the abuse I endured growing up. It’s not easy, and it’s time-consuming, but it’s worth it. Here are 13 ways to let go of anger from your childhood abuse (or any abuse for that matter!)
13 ways to let go of anger from childhood abuse
The tips I’m sharing here can be used to let go of anger from anything really, not just childhood abuse. If you were betrayed by a former partner or a friend, or maybe you were bullied in elementary school and still hang on to that anger.
I believe these tips will help you not only let go of anger but also bring more peace into your life and improve your mental health. Whether or not you have anger, these are great helpful tips to reduce stress and have more joy.
Acknowledge your feelings
The first step to healing is acknowledging your emotions. Don’t try to suppress or deny your anger and resentment. This will only damage your mental health and make you physically ill.
Allow yourself to feel them, name them, and understand why they’re there.
This doesn’t mean you have to wallow in these emotions, but it does mean giving yourself permission to feel them without judgment. Journaling is a great way to feel them and release them.
Seek professional help
Healing from childhood abuse is extremely challenging and stressful, and it’s often helpful to seek professional guidance. A therapist can provide you with a safe space to explore your emotions, develop coping mechanisms, and work through the trauma you experienced.
They will offer you powerful tools to help you let go of anger and resentment and, find more inner peace and love yourself.
Connect with a support group
Knowing that you’re not alone in your journey is very comforting. Connecting with other survivors of childhood abuse can provide you with understanding, support, and validation.
It’s also a safe place to express your fears, hurts, and other emotions with those who truly understand what you’re going through. You can find groups in your area by checking Facebook groups, going to the local church or library, or even just asking around.
Practice self-compassion
You’ve been through a lot, and it’s important to be gentle with yourself. Practice self-compassion by speaking to yourself kindly, forgiving yourself for any negative feelings you’re experiencing, and accepting that healing takes time.
Use positive self-talk instead of negative. Journal out all the things you love about yourself.
Set healthy boundaries
It’s important to set healthy boundaries with people who trigger your anger or resentment. This may mean limiting contact with certain individuals or saying no to requests that make you feel uncomfortable. And it’s ok to do that!
Chances are, at first, you’ll feel guilty for doing this, but know that it’s in your best interest, especially for your mental health and well-being.
Express your emotions in healthy ways
There are many healthy ways to express anger and resentment. Experiment with a few different ways and find the ones that resonate with you.
Some examples include journaling, exercise, creative expression, or talking to a trusted friend. Some people find that singing or playing a musical instrument helps them to shed painful emotions.
Forgive your abuser
Forgiveness is not about condoning your abuser’s actions or letting them off the hook. It’s about releasing yourself from the burden of anger and resentment.
Forgiveness can be a long and difficult process, but it will lead to peace and healing. Trust me on that. We don’t forgive them because they deserve it; we do it because we deserve it.
Focus on the present moment
It’s easy to get stuck in the past when you’re dealing with trauma. However, it’s important to remember that you are not your past.
Practice mindfulness and grounding techniques to help you focus on the present moment and find peace in the here and now.
Take care of yourself physically
When you’re feeling emotionally stressed, it’s important to take care of yourself physically.
Make sure you’re eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly. Taking care of your physical health can also help improve your mental and emotional well-being.
Celebrate your successes
Healing is a journey, and it’s important to celebrate your successes along the way. No matter how small, acknowledge your progress and be proud of yourself for how far you’ve come.
Maybe one day, you had a trigger and didn’t freak out or project your anger onto someone. That’s something to celebrate!
Find healthy coping mechanisms
Develop healthy coping mechanisms to deal with stress and difficult emotions. Some examples include yoga, meditation, deep breathing exercises, or spending time in nature. Try to take time each day to sit and be still and let your thoughts come and go.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
If you’re struggling, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Talk to a friend, family member, therapist, or other mental health professional.
There is no shame in seeking help; it can make a big difference in your healing journey. People love to help but they don’t know that you need help if you don’t ask.
Remember that you are not alone
There are millions of people around the world who have experienced childhood abuse. You are not alone in your journey, and there are people who care about you and want to help.
It’s easy to feel isolated if you don’t reach out and share your experiences with others.
Don’t be afraid to reach out for help any time you start feeling anxious, scared, hurt, or need someone to talk to.
final thoughts
Letting go of anger and resentment can be tough after experiencing childhood abuse. It takes time, patience, and dedication to heal from trauma.
Remember that it’s okay to feel negative emotions, and it’s important to express them in a healthy way.
Take care of yourself, seek professional help if needed, and use these strategies to let go of anger and resentment. With time, you can heal from your childhood trauma and create a bright, fulfilling future for yourself.
